Village Idiot
STORY, Ind. (AP) - The competition was fierce and foolish, but a man who accidentally sawed through a live wire and topped that by wrecking his truck hours after buying it more than earned the honorary title "Village Idiot."
Mark Carmichael's blunders won him the good-natured award that's been handed out for years in the tiny Brown County town of Story. The winner is whoever gets the most votes from regulars at the Story Inn's saloon.
Carmichael, the inn's maintenance man, won in part for an incident in which he cut through a live wire while using a circular saw to replace the inn's galvanized steel roof. But he also damaged his just-purchased 1998 Dodge truck - the day after he got it - by getting it stuck atop a whiskey barrel planter outside the inn.
His foolishness earned the 27-year-old a $100 bar tab at the Story Still.
Rick Hofstetter, who owns the inn about 40 miles south of Indianapolis, said the competition for this year's award was fierce.
For example, two Story Inn regulars were nominated for knocking themselves unconscious while opening their car doors. Another was nominated for burning down his front porch after not fully extinguishing a cigarette in a full ashtray.
Bartender Evan McMahon was nominated for opening an $80 bottle of Chalk Hill Chardonnay to make a $6.50 wine spritzer for a bar patron.
Not to be outdone, Story Inn housekeeper Kathy Newhall earned her nomination for using French truffle oil from the kitchen, which costs $50 for a 3-ounce bottle, to quiet a squeaky toilet seat.
But it was Carmichael who came out on top. The bar's patrons had more than enough evidence to give him the honor - not least of which was the pig roast incident.
"I cooked a couple of hogs out there on some bed springs once," he explained to a dismayed visitor.
Carmichael had cut the carcasses in half with a chain saw, then used a pitchfork to turn the meat as it cooked. He ended up serving up the portions with a hatchet.
"People loved it," he said. "We called it Louisiana style."
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